Category: Singles Spit Swap
ok this may ot be the right board but what the hell. i was dating a wonderful girl from here ... anyway to make a long story short we broke up not because i cheated or she cheated but because i broke up with her buy text. stupid coward move i know but i have a lot of self doubt issues and self esteem issues. anyway she told me it isn't closed forever but then she says if she finds someone she won't turn it down. i admit i fucked up i am man enough to admit it. but i never cheated on her. never hit her. i adored her and still do. truth be told i love and dislike myself cuz i ruined a good thing. i'm not saying i need a woman to make me happy if i'm not happy with myself how can i make someone happy. sorry got off topic. lol. i guess my question is what does she want to drop us completely or when i get myself mentally set give me another chance? i know some are thinking if you loved her you would not have broken up with her but the other side of it if she loved me she would not be quick to drop me like that? hmmm. maybe i'm wrong in what love is. all i know is that i miss her like hell. though who would miss hell. i miss her a lot and not sure what to do. i don't mind giving her her space whatever she needs. i just wish i can have her back one day
That's hard for anyone else to answer, because we don't know her reasoning. If I were you I would give it some time and try talking to her about it once things settle down.
I agree with distance runner here.
thanks all i hope it isn't coming accross as me blaming her cuz i'm not she was my idea of the perfect girl friend and still is. thanks for the advice keep em coming
Well I suppose you have learned something, but maybe you both have learned that you aren't the ones for each other as well. You did this, so you might break up with her again, so she is right to make you wait a while and see.
Do as she's doing and date.
First, breaking up by text is not why you broke up. Breaking up by text is how you broke up, it says nothing of why.
Second, why wouldn't she date again? You broke up with her, and by text no less. That releases her from the obligation to not date anyone but you.
Now, will she take you back, I have no idea. I don't know who she is, or how she feels about you. I can tell you that I personally wouldn't take back someone who broke up with me by text.
It sounds to me like you have a lot of personal issues to work out before you think about trying to get a relationship going. Worry about your own self first, before worrying about someone else.
i am not disputing silver that it was or wasn't right what i did i know it was wrong. and if she did date again i know she isn't obligated to me at all. and i am well aware that i got issues i have to work on i thought i said this in the beginning but i just miss is all. i guess i wanted to get it off my chest. and i am aware that we may not have a real shot again its something i got to deal with. am i going to stop living because of it no way. will i think about it of course i will but if she tells me that its not closed forever i will hold on to that. when we were together we were very good and got along very well. i get that people would not date there x if they did what i did but it isn't something that people can't work through. if there is beating cheating or some crazy stuff then i could agree but although this is a big deal not saying it isn't i believe it can be worked through but i guess everyone has there limitations on what they will put up with
why hold on to something you yourself got rid of? why not simply learn from this experience, and move on?
I agree with Cody. You admit you have self-esteem issues, so my advice is to work on those before you try things with her again. Of course, it's ultimately up to her whether she wants you back or not. But she might be more likely to consider it if she knows you're actively working on not just apologizing for the mistake, but working out your own issues so it won't happen again.
thanks all for the advice bless you all for that. if i had to move on i am not saying i wouldn't i don't want to become one of those who is going after someone who doesn't want him. and otion that is exactly what i'm doing actions speak louder than words after all. again thank you all for reading my board and taking time to give me advice
i think you should give it space- and see how things go.
Yeah, I agree. this is similar to what happened with my last relationship. We didn't break up through text, because i don't think that's the way to do it. We split, and agreed to take some time apart. We thought maybe we could try it again in the future, but after a while, I just decided he wasn't the one for me. You never know, this may happen to you over time as well. Just give it a while.
thank you all once again i really appreciate all of your advice
Hi,
I was in a similar relationship. I'm not going to disclose a lot of information here. It was with a girl from here is all I will say. We actually met in person and then, I returned from Liberty, began to grow in my faith in Christianity, and realized I made a huge mistake. I struggle with identity confusion everyday. The girl didn't want to deal with a relationship like that; however, I am now established in my identity now. Before dating, know someone's personality. If you don't, it will lead to undesirable behaviors in your relationships. Also, if you truly love each other, I believe you would have stayed together. A lot of relationships break up on this site because most but not all of them are long-distance. Please, please, please, do not criticize me for writing this information; i am just trying to give you good advice. I am not saying that long-distance relationships will not work; communication is the key though. You also have to trust one another, and for that to happen, takes months and years before becoming official. Anyway, that is my new stance on relationships. Have a nice day,
Hardy.
hi there and i can sympathise with you and i was in a relationship and the guy and i broke up because of the distance but we tried getting on with things and even tried dating others but we then came back and tried again and we grew closer to each other but though we had high hopes this would work unfortunately we had to split for the same reasons which was not easy for the both of us but best to work on things with your self asteem and confidence which will help you in the long run, smiles.
I cannot say what has happen in your relationship but I know in my religion we believe in dating many people to make sure to find the right mate. As for yourself, don't give up on you but try to build up your self esteem and maybe find someone else too.